Everyone was excited that Michelangelo Demetrius was coming to Metro City Elementary School. He was not only a hero who saved countless innocent lives and locked up nefarious criminals, but he was also a model citizen, an extraordinary role model, and a handsome hunk of a man. Wherever he went women swooned, kids cheered, and the elderly smiled proudly. In fact, anyone that did not treat him with love and admiration was typically shunned, and many of them locked up, either because they were criminals or because they obviously must be mad. Nobody knew where he was from, or how he had acquired his super strength, impenetrable skin and perfect abs. But the world viewed him as an immortal symbol of liberty and justice, the angelic savior who would certainly bring peace and happiness to mankind.

This day was no different from usual. As Michelangelo Demetrius stepped into one of the classrooms of Metro City Elementary he was greeted with thunderous shouts of adoration. A small man with wire-frame glasses and black hair that looked like it was always wet introduced him, and the hero himself stepped forward to raucous cheers.

“Hello children of Metro City!” Michelangelo said, and he was answered by more cheers. “In case some of you don’t know who I am…oh, who am I kidding! I’m the strongest of strong, the bravest of brave, the symbol of justice and good looks, the one and only Michelangelo Demetrius!”

More cheers.

“Right now I’m on my nationwide ‘Find the Secret Labs’ tour to shut down all the labs made by villains who are too smart for their own good, and too dumb to know how bad being evil is!”

Slightly fewer cheers and more confused looks.

“As you may know, there are reports of a secret lab hidden under this very school. But don’t worry, there is nothing to fear. I, Michelangelo Demetrius, will stop at nothing to stop that evil lab from cooking up whatever dangerous and nefarious inventions are currently underway. Those bad scientists will regret getting on my bad side!”

The classroom erupted in more deafening cheers.

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